Air Bud Pizza
by Number 1 Poe Fan
Summary: The Ninja Turtle gang gets an interesting pizza delivery...


The doorbell rang.

"Pizza's here!" yelled Leonardo to the rest of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

"Cowabunga!" said Raphael, who was lounging on a sofa reading a comic book.

"Radical!" said Donatello, who was tinkering around with a new gizmo.

"Far out!" said Michelangelo, who was in the middle of a tense game of checkers with their ace reporter friend April O'Neil.

"What kind of pizza is it?" asked April. She loved hanging out with her turtle friends but she thought they had some strange tastes in food.

"Triple anchovy!" Leonardo hollered as he ran to the entrance, a disguised sewer pipe that only the Ninja Turtles and their pizza delivery friends knew about.

"Hey what the heck is this!" the Turtles heard Leonardo shout. Sensing danger, they grabbed their weapons and ran to assist. Were they under attack by Shredder? Had Bebop and Rocksteady discovered their lair?

What they found was this: a shaggy golden retriever in a doggie-sized pizza delivery uniform clutching a hot, steaming pizza box in its mouth.

"Is our pizza delivery guy a… a dog?" said Raphael, putting his nunchucks away. Raphael was always ready for a fight, so he was a little disappointed to see a friendly dog.

"Tubular!" said Michelangelo as he ran up to the dog and started petting him.

Donatello took the pizza box from the dog's mouth and the dog gave a friendly bark.

"Where did you order this pizza from?" Donatello asked Leonardo.

"A place called Air Bud's Pizza, it just opened up" said the turtle in blue. Leonardo was a great leader and the rest of the turtles looked to him for wisdom and guidance, especially when it came to ordering pizza.

"He's a good boy!" said Michelangelo, who was taking a look at the dog's tag. "Check it out, his name is Buddy."

Buddy barked again. He seemed to have a keen intuition about what the Turtles were saying. Leonardo detected that this was a very special dog indeed.

"Hey there's a slice missing," Raphael said after opening the pizza box. Everyone looked at Buddy, who let out a very anchovy scented burp. The turtles all laughed, except for Raphael who frowned at the sneaky pup.

"Did I hear you say Air Bud?" said April who had come to see what the commotion was. "I know this dog, I did a story on him last year. He plays basketball and he helped his owner win the big championship!"

"Hey, dogs can't play basketball, can they?" said Michelangelo. He was trying to get Buddy to shake.

"Actually, I do not believe there are any rules against dogs playing the game of basketball," said Donatello, the smartest and geekiest Turtle.

Buddy barked again, then ran inside the sewer to where the Turtles had a basketball hoop set up along with a ball. The Turtles watched as Buddy used his paws and nose to score basket after basket, even jumping high enough to slam dunk.

"Radical!" the Turtles shouted in unison.

"What is the meaning of this?" said a voice. The Turtles looked and saw their wise sensei Splinter walking over with the help of his cane.

"This dog has mad skills," said Splinter, nodding with appreciation as Buddy showed off his moves. "I have long sought a worthy opponent on the court. None of the Turtles have what it takes to challenge me, and I was kicked out of the YMCA for being an old mutated rat. Perhaps this dog would like to play a game of 1 on 1?"

Buddy stopped dribbling and growled at Splinter. Even without words the Turtles all knew what the growl meant: you're on, old man.

Splinter checked his cane away, stretched out his limbs, and grabbed the ball. Buddy took a defensive posture as the ninja master bounced the ball a few times as if to test it, then started doing an insane combination of crossovers, spin moves, behind the back dribbles, and other completely sick moves. Buddy's defense was no match for Splinter's game, but Buddy matched him shot for shot. Pretty soon the score was 20-20.

"Game point," said April who was acting as referee.

Splinter took the ball and started toward the basket, juking Buddy's paws off with an incredible hesitation dribble, then leaping high for a thunderous slam dunk to give him the win. As soon as he landed he felt a sharp pain in his leg. He looked down to see Buddy with his jaws clenched around his skinny rat ankle.

"Foul!" Splinter screamed. April blew her whistle as loud as she could.

"Boooooo!" said Leonardo.

"Against the rules," said Donatello.

"Gnarly," said Michelangelo.

"Bad dog," said Raphael.

Buddy growled and barked at Splinter. The Turtles could once again tell exactly what the dog meant: Fuck you old rat, your moves are wack and if we were playing on a regulation court instead of in a gross sewer I'd be balling on you, better not bring your rodent ass anywhere near MY house or I'll show you how I really do, old ass bitch.

"Get the hell out of here," shouted Leonardo as Buddy slinked towards the door still barking insults and threats.

"I'm gonna rip that dog in half!" screamed Raphael, who was so angry that Michelangelo had to hold him back.

"We're not paying for this pizza, which sucks by the way," said Donatello.

Buddy ran back to the pizza shop where his owner Josh was busy making pies. He barked and growled the crazy story of his delivery.

"You played basketball with a rat and then a bunch of turtles tried to kill you?" said Josh. "What the hell, man. And you didn't even get the money for the pizza? This is your last warning, Buddy. One more slip-up like this and you're fired."

THE END


End file.
